Divorce, even when it proceeds smoothly, is painful for both spouses. Nevertheless, evidence points to men going through a more traumatic period of transition than women following a permanent split.
No blanket rule applies to everyone in this type of situation. There definitely are always exceptions. Still, research and surveys indicate that men overall endure a greater degree of emotional problems and diminished health in the wake of divorce than women do. Men can also sometimes seem to be more anchored to their marital relationships than females, so it may be tougher for them to break away for good.
What do some men struggle more than others?
Some of the obstacles that men encounter post-divorce may possibly be due to different methods of coping than women have. For example, experts refer to a “grieving process” following a divorce. Women may be better at effectively working through feelings of sadness and loss, letting them go and then moving forward. Men, on the other hand, tend to forego this grieving process. Those feelings can linger unresolved for a long time.
- Men may long for their youngsters because they don’t see them as often anymore if they don’t have custody. Depression can be one consequence.
- Women typically have a stronger support network to lean on and buoy them up.
- A man’s lifestyle may not be healthy – not eating or sleeping well or getting sufficient exercise – when they’re on their own. That could be due to the lack of a wife’s constant vigilance.
In addition, men can get caught totally off-guard by their divorce because it’s usually the wife who makes the first move about dissolving the marriage.
Help and hope are available
It takes time, patience and support to regain solid footing after such a big change. The resilience and nature of a man’s coping mechanisms can really be put to the test. There are professionals who can assist with divorce issues and post-divorce fine-tuning to ease this major shift.